Thursday, November 29, 2007

He is now 17 months

Exactly, today he is 17 months. Time flies. 17 months back he was only 2.6kg but now (before he gets HFMD), he was 14kg!! Emir is now a toddler instead of a baby but to me he is still my baby. Let see what he has achieved at 17 months:-

a) He has mastered a handful of words. He has more vocabs that surprised us but still i havent hear he says Ibu. As we repeated teaching him the same thing, Emir can easily get bored and ignored us. Example, we always asked him, "where is Emir Rasyid? Papa? Ibu?" Last time, he responded, but now if we asked him the same question, he will answer "Ntah" and he will start giggling.

b) He understands more what we are talking about. Emir loves to play with switches especially to switch off the fan, and we will always scolded him. So everytime, he wanted to switch off the fan, he will look at us as if to "inform" us.

c) Now he knows what he wants. He will tell us where to sit, where to sleep, and what to eat. And if only we dont understand, he will cry yang berpusing-pusing di mane-mane sahaja.

d) I read this one article. Toddler is famously a picky eaters. Yeah, thats true!! Emir doesnt like to eat soft and sticky food, example jelly even though the jelly looks very attractive. My colleague once told me that we have to teach them to eat various of food, I tried but still the result is not so convincing. He is more enjoying his everyday meals, carrot, rice, egg, fish. And yeah, he doesnt really like chicken.

e) Yeah, he is moving forward to sleep only once during the day and usually if i am around. If not, the maid will inform me "hari ni emir tak tido siang" or "emir hari ni tido tak sampai setengah jam". But during the night, i can get a very good sleep nowadays. of cos he will wake up during the night but to me, it is still OK

f) He has 12 teeths. 6 di atas dan di bawah. Scary!! hehe. He knows at least once a day he must brush his teeths but in his own way. :)

g) He is still breasfeeding. Yeah, sometimes im proud of it but seeing his teeths, enough to make me scared. hehehe

h) He loves loves to poke on me. Now, he loves to sit on my tummy and jump,jump and jump. Sakit betul sebab i kurus ok :p. What else, when i watched tv, Emir dengan selambernyer stand in front of the tv. And he gets excited when we (including my siblings) bising2 dekat dia.

i) He loves to make friend and ive seen him easy to socialize with his peers. So, our job is easier if we go to a place where kids are around. Tengok pun dah boleh buat Emir duduk diam.

j) He knows the tertib. Nak solat ade sejadah, nak keluar pakai kasut, lepas makan basuh tangan. Oh, you should see him solat suka hati. hehe.

i) Tidur wajib dengan ibu. Yesterday, i was online until almost 4am. During that period, ntah berape kali ntah Emir terjage and finally i stopped becos, he went out of the room to look for me. Padahal bapak die tido kat sebelah je. One thing about Emir, kalau terjage dari tidur, mesti memang habit die.. terus duduk walaupun mate-mate mengantuk die tu.

Cukup la kot kan, actually banyak lagi. Anyway, Emir is recovering from HFMD. He eats gradually and he started to gain weight again. Alhamdulillah. Maybe Allah doesnt allow me to go to Sudan and Im thankful for that cos I know my son needs me more than the clients need me.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Sekarang ni tengah suke edit edit gambar, abaikan laa yer..

Sayang tak terkata

Looking back at my history, i classified myself under seorang yang penggeli. (wat we call penggeli in english?). I dont like sticky hands and i couldnt let my eyes to see dirty things. I remembered when i was 11 years old, that time the whole family were effected with this virus, i couldnt recall the name. Anyway, both my legs were covered with blood and abscess and that was the reason why i have a big scar on my legs :). So everyday, it was either my parents or my late Tokwan will wash my legs since i couldnt bear to see my own legs. :)

But after Emir was born, slowly i learn to leave that habit. First and foremost, in "handling" Emir's poops. Well, even though im the eldest in the family and sometimes my parents forced me to wash my bro/sis poops, but it was very very rare. But having Emir, it is everyday occasion :D.

And when Emir was down with fever, chicken pox and recently HFMD, i dont mind to share foods with him, sleep with him (of cos) and belek2 Emir even though the virus is spreading quite fast. And it reminds me of my mum when she was heavily pregnant my bro, i was having chicken pox. I knew she knew how dangerous for pregnant mum in exposing themselves with chicken pox virus, but she still applied the cream and so on.And now, when i am a mother, i understand this is what we call uncondinally love..

Saturday, November 24, 2007

A Taste of Being a Mother

Towards the end of the year, i realized that blogging has not become my daily routine. Too many things happened which tested the whole department which i might not known if I dont get married. Yeah, sometimes balancing your life with three titles; mother, wife and staff is not that easy.

Reminder: This is a very long post. Two sides of stories - happy and sad. A gentle note for myself..

Saturday 17 November 2007

As planned, we had organized Emir's first birthday party. Even though my maid has gone back to Indon for a while or to be exact, even though im not a good cook, but i insisted to cook for that day. Plus, the menu is way too easier compared the day when i cooked the mee rebus. Anyway, i had planned the menu one month before. So i dont have to crack my head thinking what to cook. It was a simple menu. Just mihun sup, nasi goreng and mee goreng. Luckily my sister volunteered to help me for the dessert, she prepared peach jelly. Amin..

And, i found out it was not that simple when you have to do everything on your own. From clean up the mess to cutting the onions, etc to cooking. And, again, luckily my siblings and hubby were there to support me. I know i was too bossy on that day. Yeah, cos i just came back from my house on Friday night, so I only have less than a day to do everything.

So there goes the day. We spent the whole night clean up the house and only started cooking at 11+pm. Kesian my siblings cos we only had our dinner at 11pm. While hubby was taking care of our son and my siblings were cutting all the ingredients, I then was busy with the cake. Yeah yeah yeah, i baked the cake myself. Everyone in the house worried that i might spoilt the cake. Hehe. Plus, that was my first experienced using the biggest cake pan. Adalah sebesar besar sikit dari tayar kereta kancil.

Of course when you make a cake, you will start with mixing the sugar and the butter. When i was in that stage, i didnt realize that my chocolate rice, cooking choc and the van houten went missing. Oh yeah, my initial plan was to do the chocolate cake layer by layer. But after searching for quite some time, the whole planned changed. Mind you that i was very sure i have bought everything earlier. So from choc cake, it was down with butter cake. Yeah, what to do :(. A bit frustrated but something needs to be done that night. So, my cake went to the oven at almost 3am and afraid that the cake will hangit, so i minimized the heat and imagine how long i had to wait. And shortly after the cake was in the oven, i was having the shock of my life cos the whole building was blackout. So, it stopped me from doing everything, but yeah i managed to wait for my cake up until 4am+. Note: Segala bahan yang hilang termasuk candles telah dijumpai pada malam selepas semuanya selesai. Di dalam bakul baju-baju. Dan ya saya tahu siapa yang mengerjakannya. Tidak lain dan tidak bukan, anakku tersayang Emir.

Since i was too tired, i woke up the next day at 8.30am. Apalagi terkejut beruk la cos the first guest will come at 11 am and not even one thing has been done. Rasa nak menangis pun ada mase tu. First thing first, the cake. Yeah, i need to decorate the cake. How? i dont know. I was too panicked too think. To make things worst, the cake tak mau keluar dari the pan. if only the cake meant for the evening tea, i will cut it into half je. But, THIS IS THE BIRTHDAY CAKE!! I put it the pan on fire but yeah it didnt help at all. Alas, after a while,ntah angin mane ntah, the cake easily came out from the pan. Lega!!

So, decorating. since i only have white chocolate, so i thought it was fine to cover only the top of the cake. But it was not enough and the cake looked very ugly. So, last minute action, i had to use the combination of sugar and butter and sorry guest, that was the reason why the cake was a bit sweet. :). and this how the cake looked like.

And yes, i spent too much on the cake and the clock showed it was already 10am and takde bende pun yang selesai. Well, well. Ainaa was busy with her jelly. Hubby and Emir out to Tesco to buy last minute things. And yes, the first guest, Encik Usamah. Sorrylaa boss not complete yet mase ko datang.

But alhmadullillah, the guests only started coming aroung 2pm when everything was done. But yeah, Emir's party pack was not done as schedule. I have designed everything but tak sempat nak print. so end up pakai party pack dekat Tesco je:p And us, haha, selekeh :p.

One year old, he dint know what the birthday party is all about. When we sing the birthday party song, Emir was cranky. Dia takut kot tengok all the attention was on him. He dint corporate much. Forgot to tell you, Emir nyorok the candle, so end up, we only sing the song.

But, right after the birthday song, Auntie Ain, Auntie Nolee and Encik Cicak sampai and YES, they bought us a Secret Recipe's cake with a candle!! Terima kasih. At least it can compensate with my cake and the candle!! So, we had another singing session and again Emir was not cooperative. But at least Emir you have to remember that you have two birthday cakes for your first birthday party.

Thank you for those who came. We appreciate your time with us. I have splendid time with my friends from primary school, secondary school, U, and working colleague and yes to mummy blogger too!! That was the first i met Rafiqa Heliza and his two heroes. It was like a small reunion. Happy to see Puan Ain yang sedang sarat itu, Ain adik aku tak habis2 puji ko lawa, i told her that is seri orang mengandung. Again, thank you. I hope it will not ends there. My house will always open to everyone. And Hana and Sharmeen had given me one good idea. Yeah, im looking forward but not in this short period ok..

Sorry erkk,sape tak de dalam gambar :p

And as you could see, Emir is excited with the prezzies. Emir cakap terima kasih auntie-auntie, Uncle-uncle.!!

Monday 19 November 2007

When i woke in the morning, as a routine, i would kiss him on his forehead. But this time, i could feel the warm from his body. I thought it was a normal fever, so i dressed up myself and went to settle things that need to be done for my business trip. Oh ya, again i was on MC for that day. But when i came back, my maid told me Emir was on high fever, so then i rushed to the nearest panel clinic. But, as expected everytime we met the GP, the answer would always be the same. Normal fever.

He was very quite. When we were in the car, he just sit still on my laps, no words, no activities.

Tuesday 20 November 2007

I was on EL. So, i am on 6 days straight out of the office. Something I didnt feel comfortable, but since Emir's fever was quite strange, so I dare not to go to the office. But still, I squeeze some time to settle things for the biz trip. That day, Emir was cranky. He had no mood at all. The maid told me he didnt eat at all since afternoon but he did took some meals early in the morning.

That night was even worst, he dint sleep the whole night. Everyone in the house was awake since Emir didnt stop crying. He refused to take everything even my breast milk. Mind you,he never rejected food before even the Hot and spicy food. And everytime he cried, he would touch his lips and from there i know something was not right.

But at last he fell asleep after struggling with the pain. Kesian sangat.. Tambah tambah it is your own son

Wednesday, 21 November 2007

I went to the office. Yes, as predicted banyak giler keje especially assignment before im off to that trip.Actually, i couldnt that concentrate as my mind was with Emir. And the top most thing was, my guts said that i shouldnt go for the biz trip. Called home and again the answer was the same. He dint eat, NOT AT ALL. Even not his milk. But still, we dint bring him to see the paed.

Thursday, 22 November 2007

I was on MC/EL. We brought him to see the paed. And this is the second day he didnt take any solid food and his milk at all. But alhamdulillah at least he wants my breast milk. Thats fine. But i know i dont have that much supplies.

As the paed, she checked everything. Explained to her from A to Z. And she showed Emir's mouth and masyaAllah, there were more than 5 spots of ulcers in his mouths. I was so scared. Doctor checked his legs and hands, Yes, it is that rashes. Confirmed he has suffered with Hand Mouth Foot Disease (HFMD). Im scared. Yes. What else can a mother says. But truly I am. So the whole family have to be quarantined for one week. The doctor gave us two options either we monitored him at home or admitted him to the hospital and we chose the first option since we have to pay our own bill.

Of cos if only I have that medical benefit, i wont think twice and i will definitely admit him to the hospital. But in my case, i know private hospital can cost a bomb so we chose to avoid that risk. I insisted hubby to admit Emir to the govt hospital but hubby was not so keen since the paed already gave the option to stay at home. Plus, the paed has treated Emir ever since Emir was born.

After we just got into the car, suddenly i felt so cold and my body was warmed. Sudah. i told hubby to stop me to the panel clinic. And, when we reached there, i was very very weak. In the hot sunlight, I felt damn cold, so i just stayed in the car under the hot sun while waiting for my number. But only for a short while. Yes, i was down with high fever that day.

Sampai je rumah, first thing, i jumped on my bed and have a short nap cos I have quite painful headache. Emir, i asked hubby and the maid to take care of him sekejap. But most of the day, i am weak, weak and weak. And alhamdulillah Emir was quite OK that day except that he cried during the night but to me it was still acceptable.

Friday, 23 November 2007

Hari ni kebah sikit la badan but i really really had a bad sore throat. Sakit gile2, im not sure whether i get it from Emir or not. Emir, yeah, he was still not eating but alhamdulillah he was still playful and cheerful boy. At least, sebagai Ibu rase lega la sikit. But for those who see Emir everyday, we noticed that Emir dah kecik sangat. Yeah, he lost 4 kg in just few days.

This is his picture yesterday

Takde pipi, tak de perut, tak de lemak. Now his weight is 10kg, his weight if i am not mistaken when he was 12 months. Even though he is cheerful, but he is quite weak. We tried to give everything that he is supposed not to get it everytime. since Emir is afraid to eat any solid food, so we bought ice cream, yogurt, vitagen, nutrigen, milo and dadih but sadly tak banyak pun die minum.

Now, hubby is worried.

On the separate note, i was headache about my biz trip. In this situation, it really hard for me to leave my son. And after few telephone conversations, alhamdullilah they accepted my decisions. But yes, the client was not so happy. i bet my boss pun tak berkenan jugak la kan sebab last minute decision. But since the doctor advised me not to go (cos im the carrier), so better dont. For me, family comes first. Not that i dont want to go, fyi i already take the yellow fever jab, but family is top most priority. So encik saffuan, kaklong baru tahu tak pi sane semalam yer.

At night, hubby keep telling me that we will admit him to the hospital soonest possible. but i pulak yang tak berape selera. First, he already started to play with his uncles and aunties even though the fact is he did not have any foods and water. Secondly, kalau masuk hospital pun paling tinggi ye laa more supervision and paling paling pun die masukkan drips. To me, as long as Emir get my breast milk, i feel there is no need to inject him here and there.

I did sms-ed my parents and immediately both mama and baba called me. Asked for their prayer if possible in front of kaabah.

Saturday, 24 November 2007

First thing in the morning. brought Emir to see the paed. I have packed his shirts, pampers, pants in case he will admit to the hospital. But my oh my, we had to wait for two hours before our number turned up. The doctor checked him thoroughly and alhamdulillah Emir tak payah masuk hospital. Doktor kate boleh monitor pada rumah je. Amin, but we still need to be quaratined.

Conclusion, i will be fully at home up until next week. And to that, i had to cancel our schedule for this week. But yeah, im going to the office tomorrow to clear my case before my boss flying off to Sudan.

And if you read this post up until this paragraph, doakan Emir cepat sembuh ok. And me, sakit tekak yang sangat sakit.

And one lesson, now i know one reason why Allah didn't allow me to get pregnant.

Ibu-ibu, ade banyak info pasal HFMD ni dekat internet. Click here for a simple summarization of HFMD.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Tarik nafas turun nafas

Wahlaa, saya sangat kelam kabut sepanjang minggu ini. Thought when hubby came back, I can share my exhaustion with him, but aiyoo, he didnt help much. Ok ok encik husband, he did, but since your timing is still not adjusted yet, so kepenatan tak dapat di switchkan lagi.

Last Friday, when i came back from office, my maid makes her sour face. And when i asked her, she started crying. And from there, i smell that something is not right. She found out that her brother was in coma and the family desperately needed some money from her. After a while, i asked her whether she wanted to go back to Indon or not and of cos without hesitate she nodded.

Well, Mr. husband was not really agreed on this, but when i told my husband that the maid was in her room for the whole day, crying and didnt eat at all, so I guess my decision was definitely in place. i wont put my son in risk in this situation. Yeah, i called the agent and of cos they didnt allow the maid to go back cos she only stayed with us for less than a year. But since im the employer, i have the right to say yes or not.

So there goes the day, i was on EL on Monday. Went to Indon's embassy to get the approval letter from them. And Allah knows how I felt that day. Penat gile. I was there for the whole day, queue-ing and the worst part was to see most of Indonesian ludah sane ludah sini tidak kire laki atau perempuan, tua atau muda. Disgusting!!

And that nite itself, my parents held a doa selamat kenduri at home. As the eldest daughter, berkejaran la jugak since my mum currently has no maid. Luckily, there is one ustazah who let us have her maids. Not One but Three. Hehe.. Since the next day i was working, so i insisted hubby to go back to our house so i can at least maximized my sleeping hours.

On Tuesday, I was too tired, honestly i couldnt really focused on my work. Luckily my Boss-es were not in the office. It really helped me to digest my energy. That day, I was still bz on my maid's docs. And later in the afternoon, i was on EL again to send her to the KLIA.

And on Wednesday, alhamdulillah, my parents has departed to perform Haj. Emir was a bit tantrum but he managed to wait for his atuk and wan until 4 am. And again, i was on my annual leave on Thursday and today to babysit my son and jadik bibik kepada adikadik ku. Note: Cutii saya memang banyak :D

Oh ya, afraid that the message dint spread out. We will throw Emir's first birthday bash tomorrow, 17 november 2007 at our place. Actually, it is the extended version of my housewarming and Raya. Thought we want to invite the family and friends at the same time, tapi disebabkan rumah kecik je. so we have to separate it. We have invited our families couple of weeks ago so now it is for our friends pulak..

I have sent the invitation for the past one week. And guess, i will be cooking ALONE!! But whatever it is, i still bake the birthday cake.. hehe.. So, let say kalau lah makanan tak sedap.. ahahha.. ampun ya !!
Anything, just call 0123556063. hope to see u there especially bloggers mummy!!

Saturday, November 03, 2007


Orang yang jauh lagikan dikenang..

The old malay quotes that i have learnt since the last two decades and never had i known that one fine day it comes truly deep in my heart.. As you all know, this is the first time ever, i am apart from my husband for 12 days and today is my 6th day. It means i have 6 days more without him.

Is it hard?? Yes.. the longest his biz trip was 3 days, itupun when i was still on my confinement period. So i dont have to worry who is going to fetch me or when im going to pay our bills. but this time, no excuse. Slowly, i pick up the pieces. im back on the road. i gained my confidence in driving the car in this metropolitan city. and i know how sick to go one bank after another to pay our bills.

well, we are back to square one. we sms regularly. Things that we have abandoned for quite few years. we shared our daily stories and every day i look forward for his phone calls. and honestly, it is something different and sweet..

My my.. how i wish i could follow him. furthermore, he is living without INTerNET.. bukan senang tu. and i definitely sure emir and i can get extra ordinary attention from him.. heheh..

and ...

this conversation dah few days back...

manager: mira u nak pergi *****
me: dengan sape??
manager: dengan i.. but if you go, u have to leave ur son for a week. boleh ke?
me: kalau i tak pergi sape pergi?
manager: ***** ***. kalau nak pergi better tell me earlier, so i can book ticket.
me: i ask my husband dulu.. see how..
manager: ok

ok...and im going... i tak tau laa macam mane nanti.. sungguh tak biasa hidup tak de emir

Thursday, November 01, 2007

After a week

Banyak nyer nak cerita, but my schedule was so hectic for the past one week. In the beginning of the week, we decided to organize a small gatherings with our immediate family at our own house. at first, we thought that it should be ok to invite our friends and family together on the same day, but since our house is too small and it would be uncomfortable for everyone, so terpakselah separate between famly andd friends. And of cos, inviting our family is our main priority. tak sedaplah kan bile asyik tanye bile nak ajak datang rumah..

But to me, the best part was, when i told my mum i wanted to cook instead of using a caterer. Terkejut badak la mak aku especially she was not not around last weekend. risau laa, usually my mum will be the modifier a.k.a penyelamat keadaan. hehe. This time, i have to handle it on my own. Ye lah, cos i have never experienced cooking for the large number of people. So, the main menu were mee rebus and nasik ayam. The preparation started the day before. Memotong, goreng kacang, rebus ubi, kemas rumah. luckily my maid pun look forward to help me. ok, ok, of cos la kan boss die yang suruh.

To be honest, my mee rebus tak de laa menjadi. Ada yang kate macam mee mamak laa, mee kacang laa.. aiyoo but the taste was not so bad after all. but what was this disappoint me was my nasik ayam. to be specific - the chicken. since i put more emphasize on my mee rebus, so i have outsourced my ayam and we bought the chickens at tesco. Hampeh betul sebab bagi ayam tua. patut laa bile acap makan liat semacam, nak kepak pun tak boleh. definitely i will lodge a complained asap. dah laa beli banyak. if i know that will happen, i will do it myself.

alhamadullilah, even though it was such a short notice, but most of our families has turned up and our guests keep coming until 12 am. exhausted, of cos but i was so satisfied. at least, one mission has accomplised.

thought the next day i could rest the whole day, but i was wrong cos we had to fulfill open houses invitation. Sadly, we have to cut down two of it. Mummy Rizq and Najua, i am so so so sorry cos that night i have to spare my time for my hubby.

that night, punya laa pulun packing barang untuk encik husband. sebabkan dua dua dah penat, so cepatlaa dua-dua pun naik angin.. hehe.. on monday pulak, i was bz assisting my hubby for his final preparation. alhamdulillah, he is off to G*RM**Y that night and my first task was driving the car back from klia to my house. And guess wat, it took me two hours to reach my house cos banyak pit stop. Emir was not helpin me, he cried along the way. ye laa jarang tengok mak die bawak kete kot. but alhamdulillah sampai jugak.

the next day was funny, i ter overslept until 1130 am so terpaksalah on EL. hehe, i think sebab terpenat sangat kot. hehe and today, i couldnt find my car key.. So encik husband, my life is sucks without u. and this is my first time, ditinggalkan lame-lame. so salute to all wifey yang husband die askar ke, offshore ke, keje overseas ke..

ok ok emir sudah mengamuk - ta daa..

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