I am

... offically HURT..

--After 4 years ++  I am at the lowest of my self motivation at the moment..I need the warmest HUGSS from my husband now and now and now..

They might say, you should try another year, but dont you think it is not easy to move on as you keep thinking what makes meeeeeeeeeeeeee so much different from others.. I dont mind if I am less behind than others but NOTTTTTTTTTTTTTT this much.. They may have too many reasons to explain but at this moment none can console me..

Mungkin sebab tak cukup amal ibadah kepada Allah, Allah baru saje uji saya macam ni sikit jer, saya dah frust menonggeng.. Bile saya senang, senang je saya terlupe padaNya. bile susah baru nak cepat-cepat cari Dia. Ya Allah maafkanlah hambamu ini..

at least.. I have my lovely husband to depand on, one handsome boy to easily melt my heart, families to support kan..

LIFE is beautiful..