Because of these 2 boys

Sometimes I would rather keep myself busy because it will remove all sorts of questions in my HUGE brain. Yeah, enough said having Emir is the best thing that makes the 24 hours is fully booked but on top of that the WH questions seems couldn't be avoided at all.

Sorry to tell you, it is still the same old story that I keep telling you on and on. Being a tax people is an honour for me as an IT graduate but after a while I do asked myself whether is this the satisfaction that Im searching for?

Some may say I have lost my direction and it is still not to late to set up a new objective in my working career. Last week, I had a great chit chat with one of the famous partner in EY - one of the Gung Ho woman in the corporate world. She called me to hear the exact reasons why I decided not to sit for the professional exam.

Of course, the only reason that I could shared with her is the fear surrounds me and the risky future that I will jump into. To her, seven years of sacrifices is worth for the rest of another 25 years in my career life - which is true. But, that seven years can create more meaningful in my family life.

I picture myself working seven years in the auditing firm, facing the compliance which totally a NO NO for other family occasions, Havent has a chance for a weekend, do you know the ACCA class usually during the weekend from 8/9 am to 5-7pm, of course the firm provides the study leave but you are busy attending the classes and catch up for the study. I am just afraid I am not able to see Emir's first step, Emir's first word or even worst - not letting myself for the second pregnancy.

And after seven years of course the sky is my limit, but for this simple reason can I volunteer myself to dedicate part of me for work? Can my dearest hubby cope up with it? Can Emir understand that his Ibu is busy? Do I have a time to cook for my family? Do I have a time to look after my siblings?

For now, I just stick to my first rule. No to ACCA no matter how hard people pushing me unless Im working with non-auditing firm. Hey, earning capacity is not the talk of the game, Im just counting for satisfaction. Period.