hi my dear... eheh....

hmmm.... lame dah tak update nie... my last post is in May.... cian my dearie update sorang sorang...

hmm.. alot of thing happen since then... yang gembira ada.. yang sedeh pun ade... yang gembira --> tunang.. my graduation (thanks sayang sbb teman kite mase graduatioon) ... my comel punye graduation.... sape sape nak nengok gambar 3 event tue meh nengok kat galeri gambor yahoo http://photos.yahoo.com/drziner

yang sedeh plak... ada rakan sekerja PPK yg dah menemui Ilahi sbb accident kat bentong pd 18 June.. al fatihah buat allayarham rizal dan syed.. ini sebahagian asam garam alam pekerjaan... mmg nature keje kat ppk require us to travel alot.. ye laa.. traffic light kan ade kat satu msia... kene laa pi satu msia...

tup tup... dah nak masuk bulan ke 5 dah dok legenda .. la nie ade 5 dah classmate masuk legenda... proses pengkronian.. hehhe... berkongsi rezeki.. ape salahnya... tapi akhir akhir... dah terasa boring plak dok sinie.... bile laaa nak confirm nie..

the thing that prompted me to write tonite... is when i read a journal article from IEEE journal ... mlm nie dapat password IEEE Xplore from one library IPTA yg letak password die kat website.. ape lagi.. sementara dok kat umah.. sebat jerk laa... tengah dok browse browse.. sekali ade terserempak ngan conference yg author die nama melayu.. bila bukak.. lecturer usm rupenye... die tulis bout dynamic honeypot (Honeypots: why we need a dynamics honeypots? by Budiarto, R. Samsudin, A. Chuah Wee Heong Noori, S. ) .. memula bangga gak sbb ade gak lecturer msia yang penulisannya dilistkan kat IEEE Xplore.... dlm bidang yg agak sket plak penerbitannya dlm bidang akademik plak tue.... tapi yg sedehnya... bile baca article tue... its actually a rewrite of an article by lance spitzer on the same topic.. i'ved read that article during my master thesis research on honeypot .. tetapi article tue tak pula di listkan sbg reference.. and artikel nie lebih kpd menceritakan technical explanation bout dynamic honeypot(yg dicedok dari artikel oleh lance spitzer) ... bukan tentang mengapa architecture itu diperlukan seperti yg tertera di dalam titlenya...selain tue dlm article tue langsung tak citekan reference.. yg ada hanya reference di hujung article... macam tahap artikel utk majalah jerk... muskil gak.. takkan lecturer usm wat journal utk conference camnie (the 1st two name is lecturer).. or student die yg buat.. rasanya student kot yg wat.. tapi the lecturer must control laa the quality... takkan reti nak amik nama jerk... nanti maruah yg tergadai.. kalo org kate artikel tue ciplak.. yg kene nama yang awal awal itu laa... bukan yg belakang belakang..

hmm.. till next time.. see u tomorrow yang...

A promise

Having to update my blog from my collegue computer. Everyone is on leave in conjunction of Merdeka Day tomorrow. At least I would received the same questions "Where do you want to celebrate your Merdeka?" and the answer should be the same "At home, no more, last year was the last time i celebrated"..

Yerp, i could not stand the crowd stampede.. Its better for me to celebrate with the small circle of my friends or family at home. Furthermore, i can see the KLCC directly from my house.

Tomorrow im going to Perak again, mmm why aa UTP so far? Its difficult for me to talk and manage my things there? Luckily i have someone who i can hold on.. My ex-roomate for more than 4 years, Thanks Ifa . So tomorrow, i just take my transcript and settle down everything.

This week is the college break and o-oh sad news i dunno what im going to do.. I did some filing from morning just to kill my time and i finished at 11 am, so what im going to do for the next few hours? few days? Luckily i need to set 3 exam questions, at least i have something to do..

Another thing, i break my promise. I felt so uncomfortbale and uneasy especially when he was getting so mad. Tried to make up some deals with him but it did not work. HE is not my Dearie ok, HE was a good friend of mine back in SMK Taman Melawati. I confessed it was my fault not telling him the truth. Actually i really forgotten to tell him my plan until it was too late. I rarely break my promise, hmm and it was shocked when you received this kind of response. Hope Allah can forgive me, because he said "Aku maafkan ko separuh je Mira" and He hang up the call.

August 2004

So many things happen in August, and its nearly two weeks after my last post. Nooo, im not busy, but only I don't have time to write. I have plenty time during office hours, but only I am not feeling contented to type because of several reasons:

1 - using windows '95 (no java function etc)
2 - avoid my students, boss, officemate track my blog
3 - Monday - Wednesday (comes home around 10pm, too exhausted for blogging)

August 2004 means a lot to me, this is the month that

1 - I get engaged
2 - I started working
3 - met a few close friends and have a chance to hang out together
4 - I have graduated
5 - Being matured

For #1, it was one of the happiest day in my life, again, it is one step closer to my LOVELY day. I have talked more about it before this, so lets full stop talking about engagement. For #1 event I manage to list #3. Most of my closest friend gathered at my house happily celebrating the day. Thanks all. To noris, nadia, bonzer, shukoq, farina, kak b, fitri, wan, and others, deep in my heart I REALLY REALLY wanted to invite everyone, but I could not. Seriously, im not forgetting u guys... hope u can understand my situation..

For #2, I started working at ******** College ******. My colleagues are very friendly and helpful but something happen to me. It is quite hard for me to adapt to this new environment although they welcomed me. Mole at the right corner of my lips is not a promise that I am a talkative. But day to day, I tried to show my true color.. heheh, now its getting nearer... :D

For #4 yeahh!!!!!! I dah konvo.. so proud to be UTP graduates. Seriously, I do enjoyed UTP 4th Convocation Day because:

1 - Tun Dr. Mahathir bagi scroll
2 - My family were there, although my dad was really sick that time.. Thanks Baba
3 - My Dearie was there being our driver :). I dint expect I graduate with "tunang orang" title
4 - graduated with my fave Cousin Iryani Bt Lob
5 - Being away from the contract for a while
6 - Helped Nolee mission heheh

But the most meaningful happens in August is #4. I was too depressed thinking about the contract and the burden that I had to go through. Dearie said, "Think carefully, everyone's surround you loves you, we don't want u to make a mistake". Day by day, I was in pressure, either sign or not to sign and finally, after talking two times with the Director, I decided to sign the contract. 24th August 2004, I go insane. The admin asked me about the contract, I just walked out from the office, punch my card and went straightly to the shopping mall nearby. Feeling too depressed, I called, my bestest friend Hana, and I really touched what she had done for me. Straightly she came and ready to listen and control my emotion. At last, I felt so relieved that at last someone supported me to sign the contract. After having the evening class, both Baba and Dearie fetched me, hehe, Dearie was sending the message but I was so dumb to understand anything. Miscommunication occurred because of ME. But, at the end of day, everything went smoothly. Thanks Mama, Baba, Dearie and Hana. You are with me, when I need you.

Now... I sooo happy, everything is over!!!

Mira oh Mira

Stress and anger has always been related to each other. There have been countless studies, even more theories, about stress and anger and how they relate. But in my opinion, there are not related at all. Stress to me is the action that creates our level of alertness while anger is more into expressing your feeling. Enough about definition, actually I conquer both terms that leads to "my confusing decision making." The fact of life that I have to go through is far beyond my expectations but as I said before, every situation must always a reason behind it. And I'm glad that I've been chosen.

Making a decision is hard, but being ambitious is easy. I, personally, have a hard time making "spur-of-the-moment" decisions especially if it involves something rather important to me. Many things! From choosing the right course, choosing the right sweetheart (alhamdulillah, its him :))and now about my job, it is all involves making the right decision.

I am still puzzled whether education line is closed to my heart, although I know the gene is there. Both my parents are lecturer and my fiance also is a lecturer. Although I love public speaking, but can I be patient enough to confront different kinds of behavior and attitudes of the students the rest of my life? Am I being able to study again and again?

Let say, if I in the IT line, can I survive staying in front of computer from 8 to 5? Am I strong enough to handle all the pressures and workloads? Or, can I cope up to the rapid changes in the technology? Talking about working in HR or administrative, am I good enough to handle internal and outsiders of the company? Do I have the qualities to represent my company?

Answer. Answer. But for the time being, honestly, I enjoy teaching especially most of my students really giving full cooperation during the lesson and for sure a few students will interrupt the class. For the part time students, all of them are older than me, and alhamdulillah they still respect me as their lecturer. Teaching humanities subject giving me a full satisfaction as it is my favorite subjects but still I cant avoid teaching IT. (hehe but only Microsoft Word :p).

Looking at my statements, it seems that I love teaching. Maybe it's true only I dint realize. Maybe this is the only way I can contribute to the development of society. Maybe this is what im looking for. Maybe Maybe Maybe. Ya Allah, I need your help to find the ultimate answer...

PITCURE

Another clear picture

Oppss, my fiance still not updating the picture yet.. Guess what!! He lost the memory stick!!! if i had a Doraemon machine and could turn back time, definitely, i wont let him holding the camera .. jangan marah erk :)

Ok, heres some of the pics but you have to click here and here Thanks Hana and Ani

Hi fiance..

Finally everything is over... Kalau nak gambar, have to wait for my fiance (still not getting use to it) to upload some of the pictures.

Dedicated to all my beloved relatives, cousins and friends, thank you so much for helping me out on my day. Your contribution are much appreciated. Sorry i dint mention your name cos im afraid i may left somebody.

But whatever it is, today is the day that i may never forgotten, meeting some of my close friends from primary school until university era, it such a reunion besides my family. Minta maaf sebab mira mengaku tak semua mira jemput, serba salah jugak dibuatnya. But insyaAllah, next time on my big day, this thing will not happen. Hope you understand..

p/s Dod is in hospital rite now. Wishing that i can visit her..

Certainly it is beyond my control

For the first time ever, im blogging in my office. Quite depressing, because there are no privacy ( we have to use public computer if we want to be online).. As i am still new, im not comfortable with this situation.

Yerp, working spoil my agenda in August. I told you before that August is my blogging day but working, ruin everything. Ok, i enjoy working here but first thing in my "to-do-list" is adapting myself towards this environment and try to mix with other staff. Honestly, its pretty hard for me especially i have to teach myself to keep my mouth shut. Pendiam defintely is not Amira. Forget bout my job first.

Yerp yerp yerp, tomorrow is THE DAY and guess what, i dont feel any nervousness yet. Tak tau laa kenape, maybe im too buzy for the preparation and starting my new life in working. But im sure, esok mesti risau nyer..

Yesterday, i had a luch date with Sharmeen. Never meet her after standard six. She still looks the same except for, now she is covering her head with tudung. Went to Secret Recipies and met someone. Sape meen erk? :p Secret Recipies will have another loyal customer - Sharmeen.. huhuh Anyway, we met Ghazi, also, i never meet him after standard 6. Had a nice day with both of them especially Sharmeen.

At night, sedara mara came over to our house to see our preparation. Thanks. Teh, the third cousin of mine pun datang and accompanied her, Masterq and Ida. What a surprised visit but we dint chit chatted for so long since i have to fetch my sister and they were rushing to fetch Baity at Putra Station.

Anyway, enough for now.. Hope im in good conditon tomorrow..

Ampun..

Before I proceed, 1000 apologizes because I am too lazy to continue my ramblings on Friday. Find difficulties in remembering the chronicle events on that day. But that day was ***** especially I have to wait for two hours for the interview. At first, I thought I just want to quit for the job but the position is what I am looking for. Ok, I can't elaborate that long since they will become my employer very soon.

Today, my day start at 12 pm, heheh, common, give me a chance since I have to start work tomorrow. (That was also the reason I gave to my mum). Glued on tv until Melodi finished, then only I took my shower. Considered of having my lunch, but makcik told me, baba bought sotong (my fave food), and straightly I decided to cook. As usual, when I see belacan, I must add in my cooking although sometimes it is not suitable to add belacan. Yeah, I love the smell of belacan.

After Asar prayer, we (Mama, Baba, Ika and I) went to visit Cik Yah at her hostel. We usually brought some food for her and we will eat together at her school. Right after that, we went to Ampang Point to try out my baju. I wonder, if I had the body like a model, maybe I will look even prettier. Opss opss, bersyukur dengan apa yang ada.

We just shop around to see what Ampang Point offered. Mama cant stop saying, "Ampang Point is better than The Mall" every now and then. Yesterday, we went to The Mall but got caught in the traffic jam for more than one. It is definitely not worth to go there because we could not find the bakul. (The day before, I went to Mid Valley and found one shop that sell this bakul. Then, the salesgirl suggested me to go to The Mall because I can have a lot of choices.)

Suddenly, my wild eyes stopped at one section in one shop. Yes, this is the one my mum looking for and this is the one who cause my ankle sprained. Right away, I told my mum and of course we entered the shop. My mum bought two bakul and both of us laughed all the way until we went into the car. Susah-susah cari satu KL rupenye ade dekat Ampang Point je. Tu lah, gajah depan mate tak nampak, tapi semut yang jauh tu lah kite sibuk cari.

Sampai kat rumah, Ika had given me one sincere comment that I really really really don't want to hear that make me afraid to wear the baju. Hmm, children never lies..

At night, spent my time watching Konsert Sure Heboh and at 10pm I forced my sister to switch to Malaysian Idol. Hehe. Glad that Jac make it to the next round. Guess what, Ika borrowed my dad’s mobile phone and she voted for Hana. But unfortunately, she did some errors so the vote could not be counted. Baba only noticed when he received a SMS but it was from Malaysian Idol. Baba really thought it was me, but rupe-rupenye budak kecik tu. Bukan satu die hantar, adalah dalam 3-4 SMS. I dint teach her OK, even I also dunno she sent the vote. Hai budak-budak zaman sekarang advance betul..

Ok, cant wait to see what happen tomorrow..